There are countless variables
when you find out you’re pregnant beginning with your due date, to your child’s
gender, to the kind of parent you hope to be. One thing I always knew beyond a shadow of a doubt was that
I was going to breastfeed my child (God willing). Now, before I continue let me
just say, I have absolutely nothing against mothers that don’t breastfeed, sometimes it’s just not an option for one reason
or another.
Brian and I have joked many
times about me breastfeeding because “why spend money when the milk is free?”
but the truth is I wanted to breastfeed because I truly feel that it is the
best thing for Lucas. The American Association of Pediatrics has done countless
studies of the effects of breast milk in infants and their mothers which only further solidified my desire to breastfeed. Knowing
that I am supplying my son with the perfect
nutritionally balance ddiet is something that is so important to me. It’s a mix of everything his little body needs to grow strong and healthy and
has all the antibodies from me to help fight infections and sickness. It’s
formulated for him so it just wasn’t
an option for me to use formula. But all
joking aside, the price of formula adds up quickly and with the rising costs of
just about everything else in our world, it’s nice not having that added burden
on my wallet!
Just before Lucas was born I
was reading my friend Mandy’s blog about her
struggle with breastfeeding. Her blog is about as honest as they come, and
after reading what she went through I was nervous that perhaps I’d have the
same experience. While she ultimately wanted to breastfeed, she just knew it
wasn’t going to be possible for her and as devastated as she was she has taken
it all in stride. I admire her strength!
Luckily from the moment L was
born, we’ve had a very easy go of it. He immediately latched correctly, luckily
for me since not one nurse offered to help me out, and ate like a champ! Since
then we’ve only gotten better at it. I no longer need the Boppy and in fact am
able to walk around while breastfeeding! Lucas can find his way to me in the
pitch dark (which helps with the 3am feedings) and he is able to eat without
hurting me – yet! I have yet to master feeding him in public however, but I
think that’s more due to my insecurities about how people still view public
breastfeeding. In the beginning we were averaging a feeding every 1.5 hours and
it would last no longer than 3-4 minutes. I made, and continue to make, a
conscious effort to feed from both sides each time which for me is more about
comfort than anything else. Now that Lucas is 10 weeks old we are averaging a
feeding every 3-3.5 hours that last more than 15 minutes. My little man truly
loves to eat!
During the first six weeks of
my maternity leave I breastfed him exclusively. I was unable to order my breast
pump until 5 days after L was born, and then it took almost two weeks to
receive it. When it arrived I have to admit I was terrified of it. I had heard
so many stories of the pain it causes, especially if you are pumping and
breastfeeding at the same time. I also began to get anxiety about pumping when
I returned to work. In speaking with friends of mine that pumped I began panicking
when I realized I didn’t have a “stash” ready in the freezer for him. What if I
wasn’t able to get that much each session and needed extra? One of my friends
told me she went back to work with TWO WEEKS worth of frozen breast milk … at
4oz every 3 hours for two weeks she would need to have 448oz stashed away! Are
you freaking kidding me? Knowing I only had three weeks left of my maternity
leave I knew I had to start pumping ASAP.
I definitely struggled in the
beginning with the pump. There were times that I would cry and want to break
the machine. Not because it hurt but because I wasn’t getting ANYTHING out of
it – I was lucky if I was getting an ounce from each side. At that rate I knew
I’d never have enough to send with him to daycare. I reached out to the two
people I trust the most when I have questions about these sorts of things – my sister
and my friend Jami. They both said many of the same things – water, water,
water and lots of protein. They both also said they found eating oatmeal helped
maintain their supply. I immediately went out and bought a BPA free Contigo and stocked up on oatmeal. I’ve always been a big protein
eater from my bodybuilding days so that wasn’t a struggle. I almost instantly
saw an increase in my supply. Sarah also mentioned that I should pump before I fed Lucas instead of after. She
said she did that with C and it was easier to let him take longer to eat than
it was to pump endlessly after he emptied her out!
After talking to them I began
pumping in the morning before his 8am feeding and again at night before his 8pm
feeding, but was only getting about 3-4oz total each time. Meaning I was
stashing two bottles a day if I was lucky. But there were times when I would
only get 2oz and other times when I would get 6oz. It’s definitely frustrating.
By the time I went back to work I had one week’s worth of daycare bottles
frozen for a total of fifteen 4oz bags. I figured he’d have three bottles a day
at daycare and then I would breastfeed at night. I felt comfortable with that
amount as back up. I also knew that when I went back to work, I’d be pumping at
least two times during the day and was aiming for three so whatever I pumped
would replace his bottles at daycare the next day so hopefully I wouldn’t have
to touch my stash too often.
The last week of my maternity
leave I struggled the most with my supply. I just couldn’t understand why I
wasn’t getting enough even though I was drinking tons of water and eating a
balanced diet full of protein. It was disheartening. Poor Brian got the brunt
of it. I would get so upset and feel like I was failing as a mother. I would
take it out on him and it wasn’t fair – he had nothing to do with it. Anyone
that has tried to pump can tell you it’s not
easy. Eventually I started doing some research of my own. I read about the
different sorts of pumps, the type of diet I should be eating, the times of day
I should be pumping to get the most out of it and the one thing that kept
coming up was the actual pump itself. The kind of pump you have can definitely
impact your experience. Per Obamacare most insurance companies will supply you
a breast-pump for free, the brand depends on your insurance. Unfortunately for
me my insurance only allowed me to get an Ameda Purely Yours. From the
beginning it was awful, I could only pump from one side at a time (doubling the
length of time it took to pump) because it wasn’t powerful enough to do both.
And even then I needed to put it on max suction (ouch) to make it work. It didn’t
come with any kind of carrying bag and the flanges were too big for me. All of
that added up to a really difficult start to my pumping experience. I reached
out once again to some of my mommy friends and family asking which pumps they
had and what their experience had been. Time and time again the responses were “MedelaPump in Style” and “FANTASTIC” … When I talked to my cousin and told her of my
struggles she mentioned that she had a spare Medela that I could borrow if I
wanted! I practically cried at the offer. I immediately accepted and can’t even
begin to describe the difference it made. Since then my experience has been
dramatically different. It takes me 15 minutes max to pump, I can use the
mid-suction setting and the flanges are a perfect fit. It has literally changed
my attitude about it. As much as pumping is still time consuming and can be
frustrating having a pump that works makes it all worth it.
I started a new job on November
4th and because of that it’s a challenge to get in three sessions a day.
My job is very demanding (which is great) so I’m lucky if I can sneak out
twice. Although for the last week, I’ve been pumping on my lunch break too so
that’s been helpful. In the mornings I average about 8-10oz per session and the
afternoon I’m typically getting about 4-6oz. L’s pediatrician told me yesterday
that she’d like to see him eating 5oz every 3.5 hours now, so I realistically
need to be pumping 15-20oz per day to keep up with his daycare needs. Luckily I
work in a very supportive environment! If you add up the time it takes to set
up the pump, the actual session and then clean up, it is about 30 minutes for each
15 minutes pump, broken down over the three sessions I’m looking at an hour and
a half away from my desk each day. I’ve had to compensate by eating lunch at my
computer so I’m not away for too long. If I didn’t have an understanding boss,
I could see where it might be difficult to continue pumping.
What’s funny is, over the last
three weeks I have become very creative in my pumping sessions – I have
literally pumped just about everywhere… at home, at the office, my mother’s
house, many a public bathrooms, in the car and most recently I’ve learned the
art of pumping while driving! Thank god for the hands-free pumping bra and the
V9 car attachment (thank you once again Sarah & Jami)! They really do think
of everything! JI have set an ultimate goal of breastfeeding for one year. But within that am setting smaller goals – the first was to get through maternity leave (check), then to three months (almost check), then we’ll aim for six months, then nine, then a year – hopefully all will go according to plan, but if it doesn’t I’m comforted in knowing that with each passing day that he’s eating breast-milk exclusively I’m doing what is best for my son.
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